I like a cupcake. They're just the right size, and they look quite pretty.
But the way they're fetishised by adult women who like to pretend that their whole lives are vintage dresses, china tea-cups and whatever other form of infantile kitsch is currently du jour, (as opposed to the reality of Marlboro Lights, Jacobs Creek and Primark) kind of, you know, puts me off.
The humble Jam Tart however, remains entirely untouched by twat associations, meaning its bite-sized sweetness can be enjoyed without making you feel like the average twenty-something dick from Clapham.
This recipe is perhaps one of the laziest I have ever written, so lazy, that I almost wonder whether you may as well just buy some. But there is something about the ceremony of assembling the ingredients, and the smell of baking pastry, that makes it totes worth it.
Ingredients (makes about 12)
1 packet of ready-made butter shortcrust pastry (lots of ready-made pastries use vegetable oil. Don't get those, they're a bit shit).
1 bottle of Hartley's Squeezy Jam in a flavour of your choice (I said this was lazy).
A few tablespoons of flour.
Butter for greasing.
Directions
Leave the pastry out of the fridge for half an hour or so to allow it to reach room temperature. Sprinkle flour on the kitchen surface, and rub some on the rolling pin, and roll pastry to about 1cm thick.
Using a round cookie cutter, cut out pieces of pastry, and place them into a greased muffin tray. If you run out of space to cut, scrunch up and re-roll.
Prick holes in pastry, and bake for 20mins at 180C/Gas Mark 4.
Remove from oven, and squeeze a generous amount of jam into each pastry case. Return to oven for 15-20 mins.
Remove from oven and leave to cool for at least 20mins. Mouth will not will the 'Mouth v Hot Jam' battle.
Serve entirely without irony.